...This Isn't Just The Story Of A Girl...
Sunday, August 31, 2008
10476 steps later here we are...So my day started out fabulously, I can't say I woke up because that would be a lie, I was up all night thinking, and spent most of today thinking. Everything was going awesomely until I got a text from a friend stating he was upset...I knew why so naturally I felt bad, then me being me...I had to show I cared by acting the fool...and asking whats up....with each of his responses I felt even more guilty to the point where I took off without my phone because I needed to be alone to think. Then I came back, got my phone, took off to think again and 10476 steps later here we are. I'm got really in a "details! details!" mood tonight, sorry ladies and gents. I still feel slightly blah, but its better than before.
<3 Ina
PS....DAN! DAN! DAN! I told you I'd write you in today. BTW I may call you tomorrow...haven't decided yet.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
I had more glitter on me than a stripper...Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. SO! The last 24 hours was nothing less than stellar. Well...mostly stellar...ONWARDS!
Let's start at billings bridge. So Josh and I show up and we're waiting for other people...and by other people I mean Shaun. Now previously in the week I learned he was going to be there, so I prepared myself to ignore him (which I did...because I didn't want to see him but I was willing to put up with him). So he shows up, and we're waiting for the bus..and he sends me a text message that says "I hope your happy, I'm not going to make a scene." and then disappears. Now I'm thinking, what the fuck is the fool on about,right? It's only natural. So we notice he's gone, and Josh tries to call him to see where he is...no answer. We tried to reach him three times. He didn't answer all three times. That's maturity for you folks. The man is/is almost 29. High school was over for him 11 years ago. He should act like it.
Anyways...the bus we were waiting for never came so we decided to cab it to Walkley bowling lanes. So we get there and Kyle is already there...Matt and Jamie we're walking from bank, Adam lives like 5 min away (quoting Josh) and Alex showed up as we were paying for our game. So then we broke off into teams and went to our respective lanes. It was Matt, Jamie, Adam and Kyle, Josh, Alex and I. About three two games in Matt asked why I was being so quiet...honestly, I wasn't happy with him.
I was mad at Matt because the night before we were talking about girls (god only knows how we got on that topic) and he was saying how girls like me make his skin crawl...and he despises us....but I wasn't supposed to take it personally. I told him I wasn't going to get unnecessarily mad...but I thought that it was pretty necessary. I mean how would you feel if one of your friends said "it's like the feeling that there are bugs squirming under your skin"...yeah, that's what I thought...He also said he didn't like girls who draw attention to themselves...whether he(or any man) likes it or not...most girls do draw attention to themselves, if they didn't how would you notice a hot girl? HMM? HMM? INA FTW!
So after bowling, Kyle left because he had to work at 8am the next morning...the rest of us headed to Liam's. Now through all of this I had been fighting a terrible headache(started at billings about 2.5 hours before). Just thought you should know. So the night goes on, I get tired so I put my head on Matt's shoulder (which is surprisingly comfortable)...and then I lift my head up because I realise I didn't ask first(which could've been bad)...but he told me he didn't mind...so I snuggled up to him (not too intensely...)(I just put my head on his shoulder and my arms around his arm)....and fell asleep. I'm guessing I was out for awhile...because when I woke up it was after 2am...ANNNNDDDD I think he had put his head on mine a few times(because due to a freak hairspray incident had more glitter on me than a stripper) he had glitter from the bottom of his neck to the top of his ear. Strangest thing about that whole thing? I've never EVER felt so safe/comfortable/relaxed on a guy before. Weird eh?
<3 Ina
Thursday, August 28, 2008
I hereby declare it...Bah, I'm kind of having one of my relapse days. Which sucks. I don't want to think about him anymore! I don't want to know about him, or talk about him, or talk to him! Or anything! I want him to be non-existent! That's why I blocked him on facebook. Both accounts. Blocked him on msn...and deleted him from my phone and the sim card. Not like he's trying to contact me anyway, he's convinced I hacked his accounts. I'm convinced he cheated on me the weekend he broke up with me (on the phone after I left his apartment). I don't care what he, his sister or his best friend says! Why else would he go from "I love you" to "I don't know anymore"? This whole summer has been bullshit. I'm glad it's over.
I didn't get any sleep last night. I was too busy trying to write out a letter of application, revamp my resume and thinking. My mind wouldn't just shut the fuck up and let me sleep.
Baking always helps me feel better, I'm looking for a brownie recipe, I'm going to bring it to the dorms later for Dan. Even though he doesn't feel like wearing pants. MEH! It'll be a no pants day! I HEREBY DECLARE IT! That means I should probably shave my legs...I can still wear a skirt cause there not pants! YAY LOOP HOLES!
<3 Ina
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Oh yeah, jocks totally eat that shit up..."Jocks like him always want freaky girls. Girls with horn-rimmed glasses and vegan footwear and Goth makeup. Girls who play the cello and wear Converse All-Stars and want to be children’s librarians when they grow up. Oh yeah, jocks totally eat that shit up. They just won’t admit it because they’re supposed to be into perfect cheerleaders..."
-Juno
Now I'm starting to wonder if that quote is actually true, are we driven to hide are true feelings for someone because we're afraid they won't be perceived as socially acceptable? Or is it because of the image we believe we have to uphold? Would it really be weird to see a "prep" with his arms around a "goth" or a "punk" instead of a cheerleader? HOW PAINFULLY HIGH SCHOOL! Label's are for soup cans...what a cliché.
Why are people so discouraged about how others appear to be? Yesterday after orientation, I was walking to C building and these two blonde's who dress almost exactly alike (human cloning at its finest)we're talking about how trashy I looked. Now I could've turned around and said something, but I didn't. I like my striped shirt and back lace leggings. The reason people blend in is so they don't stand out, so people are less likely to judge them. People can judge me all they want! At least they'll know I exist and they'll remember the colour of my hair and the style of my clothes! If you're only going to look at me and judge me on the way I'm dressed you can carry on with your shallow life, marry someone with half a brain and no personality, and enjoy their company...at least they look nice right?
<3 Ina
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Let's start over...Okay sooo...today I found out the ex got a new facebook because he thinks I was deleting people off his facebook. Now why the fuck would I want to go into my ex's facebook and delete people? What purpose does it serve me? Honestly? None. I think he's paranoid....scratch that...I KNOW HE IS!
So Dan moves into rez tomorrow! WHOOT! I'm excited cause he seems pretty cool. Unfortunately I didn't see Dorian today. I'll see him soon though, we're like 2 feet away, most of his classes are in J most of mine are in N. He just case to remember to bring his phone...lol. I have to ask my dad to get me a Mac book...unless he wants me to come home at like 2am...every night.
But other then that this is the perfect opportunity to start over. I know the ex got a new email and facebook, so he's trying to cut me out of his life....well not that it matters anymore he probably already thinks I'm psychotic..so I saved him the trouble. I blocked him from facebook (both accounts) and msn. Deleted him from my phone...including the simcard. Not that he'd care...I haven't told many people this but a few weeks ago, just before his grandfather died we were hanging out at his apartment, he told me that he still liked me more than a friend and he wanted to take me on a real date...like a fucking idiot I fell for it. We fooled around. I didn't sleep with him because I couldn't do it...and now he doesn't call or talk to me. He doesn't want anything to do with me. He used me and that's why I'm so bitter. Okay? UNDERSTAND? WE CLEAR NOW?
Now you all know....
<3 Ina
Monday, August 25, 2008
I spoke too soon...Here's one more thing to add the the WORST SUMMER EVER LIST! My sister and I were dying my hair with manic panic...I went to wash it out and was dyed FUCHSIA! Holy fucking Christ...and to top that shit off I think my ex is already moved the fuck on to another girl...MR I DON'T WANT A FUCKING COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP! BULLSHIT! IT'S NICE TO KNOW I CAN BE THROWN AWAY AND FUCKING FORGOTTEN THAT EASILY! For all of you fucking rocket scientist out there, yes clearly caps IS needed because I'm pissed off and I feel like shit, and if any of you have a problem with it you can go smother yourselves. Plastic bags or pillows will suffice for completing Ced action...and you may want to ask for help.
Sometimes it feels like I shouldn't be alive anymore, but we all feel that way sometimes.
<3 Ina
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Worst summer of my life...so far...It's nice to know that people are actually reading my blog...lol. Since I've put the counter up I've had 30 hits! Yay me! Moving on...
So this is officially THE worst summer of my entire life so far. I got dumped over the phone at the beginning ...and to top off my summer I got FIRED yesterday or being inconsistent...what the fuck does that even mean? Seriously. I was usually on time for work and coming back from my breaks. It may have something to do with the fact the super bitchy manager caught me painting my nails and texting people...OH FUCKING NO! THE STORE IS COMPLETELY DEAD AND I WORK IN COSMETICS SO I'M PLAYING WITH MAKEUP! As for the texting...who gives a fuck...Now I need a new job that I can only work weekends at...any suggestions? Click the email button located in the bottom left corner of the screen.
Good things that came out of this summer? I graduated high school, I'm starting college, I got my laptop fixed and I'm going out more. Also the proactive seems to be working and I've learned to take better care of myself. Now I just have to practice Getting up early for school and I'm set.
Last night was Julie's going away party! We went to Tao, it's nothing spectacular(we had VIP), I still like tila better (hands down) but I still had fun. I'll miss Julie alot and I've made a few new friends which was awesome. Also I got a free ticket to the Midsummer Night's Dream party going on there next Friday night. I'll have to sell that ticket because It's Josh's birthday...and I'm not really into Playboy Playmates.
Dear Karma, Stop being a bitch...I think I've suffered enough.
<3 Ina
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Rules Rules Rules...This boy confuses me to no end. No I'm not talking about my ex-boyfriend, I'm talking about another boy, a friend who's really sweet and nice and shy. I work with him...but I won't be for very much longer...and you know what that means...HE'LL NO LONGER BE OFF LIMITS!!!! WOO HOO! Let me elaborate, I have a NO dating co-workers rule...which epically failed if we rewind to 2004...where I dated a co-worker, broke up with him and had to work with him up until he quit a year ago. NEVER doing that again. Also another rule I broke? I dated my ex twice....I won't be doing that again. I've done my recycling..lol.
My top three rules...
1. NO DATING COWORKERS (results in awkward breakups.)
2. DON'T RECYCLE BOYFRIENDS (results in getting unnecessarily hurt..again)
3. NEVER DATE YOUR FRIENDS LEFTOVERS(think about it...eww.)
and...If he cheats on you and you go back...you deserved to be pushed in front of an out of control school bus full of terrified children just for your stupidity alone. I paint such pretty pictures with words. I'm clearly going to hell in a hand basket..a very very flammable one. Anyways I have plenty more rules..cause I'm that cool.
ttyl and such loyal readers!
<3 Ina
BTW. I have a hit counter now at the top of the page. YAY ME! aaaaaannnnnnndddddd SCENE!
BTW X2...cute, shy, nice coworker boy has made it clear in the past he only wants to be friends...I'm going to respect his wishes...for now. (dun dun duuuuun)
Saturday, August 16, 2008
We all know inter-species romance is weird...So...I'm starting to think that people (one in particular) doesn't understand the meaning of "LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! DON'T TALK TO ME, DON'T TEXT ME, DON'T EMAIL ME, DON'T CALL ME AND DON'T SHOW UP AT MY WORK OR HOME"
Speaking of thinking, I've been doing alot lately. In all honesty I'm terrified of college. I'm hoping it's not like high school...at all.
Moving on...I <3 DOWNTOWN OTTAWA! I'm going to be spending alot more time down there. Hitting it up three times this week! It'll be stellaaaaar! speaking of which I have to buy bus tickets!
Recently, I've had this boy on my mind. A boy who's just friends...unfortunately. But whatever, I'll try to move on from him again. I mean I've only been attracted to him since I met him. No big, right? Right? Fuck. It's always hard to get over him, because one way or another he always manages to weasel his way back into my mind. It sucks. Something I want most is what I can't have...fucking human nature.
A wise man once said "We all know inter-species romance is weird"...It's unrelated I know...but Tim Burton is a wise man...lol.
<3 Ina
Friday, August 15, 2008
OMGWTFLOLBBQSTRESS!Sooo....I hate doctors. And I've probably made that clear to all of you a thousand times over. Sorry about that! I had a doctors appointment today and it was WAY awkward. I know this might sound crazy but I think my doctors either a dirty old man...or a mad scientist. Either way I don't trust him IN THE LEAST. RAWR!
Speaking of dirty old men I don't trust(anymore)...I can hear the I told you so's now...I got a facebook message from Shaun the other day basically professing his love for me. Let me put this in my own words...WHAT THE FUCK! WHY! Like ever since I've been single he's gotten annoying...because well...everyone that knows him knows he's annoying. Then annoying got creepy. Then creepy got stalkery.And stalkery got Owned...lol. Basically I told him to fuck off and I didn't want to see or hear from him anymore. WHY is it the people(guys) I trust end up getting super creepy or falling for me? I don't get it. At all. It's stupid. end!
Anyways, enough about that. Long story short, he ever shows up at my house or work again, I get to call the police. YAY LAW ENFORCEMENT!
Moving on...school starts in less then 2 weeks. OMGWTFLOLBBQSTRESS! I don't even have a list of stuff I need. My parents won't buy me a mac book because "they need to see it on paper" NEWSFLASH! If i knew how to get it on paper I would. PS Pencil on paper doesn't work. They want a document from the school. LAME!
Thats all for today
<3 Ina
Sunday, August 10, 2008
MANIFEST DESTINY...Hola people of the interwebz! Here is what you missed over the last little bit. This fabulous person named Jen rescued me from my patheticness and moping and got me out on the town! (shout out to mom for the intro!) So we went down town and I had a blast. The weekend was spent in Kingston...and i love Kingston....no lies. More on the events later homeboys!
MANIFEST DESTINY! (make your own destiny)
<3 Ina
